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April 28, 2010

WiW: Week 5

Weight: 150.2

Waist: 31.5
Hips: 38
Thigh: 24

Oh. My. Hell. Up another pound? Really? We went to Conroe last weekend for a party, and I did drink, but I didn't think I ate all that much. When I got on the scale Monday morning, I thought there might even be a slim chance of breaking even, and instead I was up over TWO POUNDS. Worse, it wasn't water weight or anything, because it hasn't dropped away. I know I've been no angel on the food front, but I'm doing better now than I did in the beginning, and I just keep getting heavier.

Running seems to be causing me some intestinal issues, too. At first I thought it was the result of too many M&M's, but I've been off them for over a week, and nothing is getting better. In fact, I'm all crampy after I run, and sometimes it lasts into the next day or two. I now have two things to be happy about at the end of a run: I'm done, and I haven't crapped my pants.

I'm really looking for some sort of breakthrough, here, in size, in weight, and in desire to run.

Posted by me at 9:58 PM | Comments (0)

April 22, 2010

I haven't talked about my boobs in a while

So I haven't said anything about this boob deal, because I've had this one really silly symptom. But it's a symptom that keeps coming back, so I added it to my list of issues to bring up to my doctor at last week's physical. I figured at the best, I can stop worrying about it for the summer (I would have brought it up to my gyn in August) and at the worst, at least we would have caught whatever it was early.

The symptom? My left nipple itches.

It doesn't itch all the time, more like a few days on, a few days off. It doesn't look different. It's not red, or flaky, or dimpled. In fact, aside from the inconvenience of regularly trying to itch the damn thing in public without being considered uncouth, it's no more or less than a minor discomfort.

A stinking little itch that my doctor took seriously enough to do a breast exam, which I expected. And to sign me up for a mammogram and breast ultrasound, which I didn't.

I instantly felt a little worried that such concern was warranted, relieved that my doctor was taking me and my itch seriously, and very, very old, because the doc said something to the effect of "you're old enough to get a baseline, anyway."

Wha?

When did I get old enough for mammograms?

Nevertheless, yesterday I found myself wearing a less-than-stylish wrap gown, and having my boob molded like playdoh, then squashed like, well, playdoh. Two sets of images later, I was laying in a dimly lit room with a ceiling covered in pulsating starry lights, waiting for another physical exam, followed by an ultrasound of the offending boob. The concern, Paget's disease, is so far unfounded. No calcium deposits under the nipple, no lumps found either by touch or imagery, normal lymph node, no visual abnormalities.

Barring any flaking, redness, puckering, discharge, etc., I'm good to go until I turn 40.

Which will be here sooner than I think.

Posted by me at 10:20 PM | Comments (0)

April 21, 2010

WiW: Week 4

Weight: 149.2

Waist: 32
Hips: 38
Thigh: 24

I ended up skipping Friday's run to go to the school's fundraiser Luau. I was exhausted from set up/attending/tear down, and I think I got a decent workout anyway. I don't remember being up and moving around wearing me out so bad before: either I'm more out of shape than I thought, my thyroid is really trying to kill me, or I'm getting old.

I made up the run on Saturday, even though it was RAINING. Week 4 had seemed so daunting, and I couldn't believe that I ran every bit of the run portions. I actually felt halfway decent when I got back in the house, maybe because it was so cool. Running in the rain turned out to not be so bad after all!

I'm totally counting mowing the lawn as exercise, since I haven't added anything else in yet. I'm still afraid that the shred might derail my running, but I'm not denying that I probably need to add some strength training or something in. Also, I need to eat less.

Bah, I'm hungry.

Posted by me at 10:07 PM | Comments (0)

April 20, 2010

Normal, dammit

Well, shit. I got all my bloodwork back from my physical, and everything is normal, including my thyroid. It's not borderline normal, it's not at the low end of normal, it's dead center of normal.

Which means my tired fat ass? Is tired and fat because I'm freaking OLD.

And the 10 pounds I've gained in the last 4 months? I'm not getting any help getting rid of it.

I was really counting on having a little medical help getting rid of this weight. More energy. More zing. More zest.

I'm glad I'm healthy and all that, but I'm really not sure how I'm going to get this weight thing under control if this is the new, normal me.

Posted by me at 9:19 PM | Comments (0)

April 17, 2010

Go me!

I can't believe it! I ran all of the C25K Week 4 Day 1 run! I thought the program was crazy, going from running 9 minutes total last week to 16 minutes this week, with way less recovery time between runs. Sure, my pace dropped off badly during the running portions, but for once it was my legs that were dying instead of my lungs, at least for the first two or three running sections. And I even did it in the rain!

I still don't like running, but I'm feeling pretty damn proud of myself right now!

Posted by me at 10:10 PM | Comments (0)

April 14, 2010

WiW: Week 3

Weight: 148.8

Waist: 31.5
Hips: 38
Thigh: 24

I wasn't sure I was ready to start week 3 on Wednesday. Then it was CRAZY windy outside, even crazier windy than usual. As much as I wanted to attempt week 3, I didn't want to get knocked out by a giant headwind, so I figured I'd go on a hard walk. I ended up doing some running, including one two minute stretch. My other option was to skip Wednesday, do week 3 on Thursday, run Saturday and I'd be back on schedule, but there's no way I could have skipped two days and done week 3, so I'd have been back a day anyway.

By the time I actually started Week 3, I had totally psyched myself out. I was totally shocked that I managed to run 3 continuous minutes! Sure, I was making squeaky wheezing noises, but I did it! The whole workout seems to go a lot faster, even though those two 3 minutes runs feel like they last FOREVER. The workout is also two *real* minutes shorter, which is probably why it goes by so fast.

I had my doctor's appointment today, and at this point I'm pretty much praying that my thyroid is low. Nothing else really explains my desperate NEED to stay on the couch. My doc even did an EKG while I was in the office, donating blood and urine and scheduling a MAMMOGRAM. When the hell did I get old enough for one of THOSE??

Aside from the tired, everything looks good. I'm already talking myself up onto a roof in preparation for Week 4. Frankly, I think I'd rather jump.

Posted by me at 8:57 PM | Comments (0)

April 7, 2010

WiW: Week 2

Weight: 147.2

Waist: 31
Hips: 38
Thigh: 24

I finished week 2, but I have to say, the third day was harder than the second. I don't know if it was because I had two days off over the weekend, or it was because it was windy. I have serious doubts over being ready to start week 3.

I'm still disappointed in the lack of weight loss. And I was horrified at what was looking back at me in the mirror when I was trying on clothes. Then I took a shower in the upstairs bathroom, a room that has lower mirrors than my bathroom, and I saw an awful lot of cheese that wasn't there before. And two giant dimples, one in each cheek.

Now THAT'S what I call motivation.

I'm doing a little better with the food, but not much. I went ahead and made an appointment for a physical next week. I'm hopeful that I need my thyroid meds upped, because that would help explain the tiredness and the inability to lose weight. (Yeah, I know it's only been two weeks, but this isn't the first time I've tried.)

Posted by me at 9:53 PM | Comments (0)

April 1, 2010

Suck

Last night, Owen threw a big ol' fit at bedtime. It started when I didn't let him play with his water cup, got worse when I took him at his word when he yelled "NO" when I asked him if he wanted his story and paci, and hit supersonic when he punched me in the neck with the paci when I gave it to him and I put him to bed without it.

Normally, I would have given the paci back to him when he calmed down enough to be reasonable about taking it, but it occurred to me that he shouldn't have the damn thing anyway. I had promised myself that I'd have him weaned off it by the time he was two, but I've been selfishly enjoying my sleep too much to mess with it. In the last few months he seems to have grown more attached to the thing, making me think this whole process isn't going to be pleasant.

I'm feeling a bit guilty (me, feel guilty?) about the way I started this, on a tantrum and not with a reasonable explanation and a big hug. The end result would probably have been the same though, some screeching and begging and hours later some sad calls for Daddy. And things have worked out well since then, with the reasonable explanation happening at naptime today (about half a dozen times), followed by 10 minutes or so of halfhearted complaints. Tonight, Rex only had to tell him the paci's were gone once or twice, and that was the end of it. I'm not fool enough to think that this is the end of the story, but it seems to be going well so far.

And yes, I still wish I had done last night a little differently. Maybe we could have avoided some of the screaming. But I don't think he's going to be permanently scarred, and I do think that it needed to be done.

Now, I have to go hide those damn pacifiers before he sees one.

Posted by me at 10:27 PM | Comments (0)