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July 14, 2008

And well and truly in charge

It's time to face facts: Owen has become a crappy sleeper. This waking multiple times a night and requiring constant pacifier intervention has been going on too long to be just "a couple bad nights."

I don't know what happened. I was properly impressed by his ability to go 8 or 9 hours in a stretch without waking. I never took it for granted. I survived Katie, I know what sleep deprivation truly is. As far as I know, we didn't change anything that should affect nighttime sleep.

Owen has also learned some new sounds. His favorite: the piercing shriek. He uses it for both good and evil, and it's usually hard to tell the difference unless you're sitting next to him. I feel sorry for the people who sit near us on the airplane next week, since even the happy version is earsplitting.

He's very grabby these days, snatching anything he can get his little paws on and shoving it directly into his mouth. I'm convinced he could sit for short periods, if only he weren't always reaching for his toes and trying to consume them. When I do set him on his bottom and hover to catch him when he lists to one side or the other, he leans forward to suck on my shins, or to either side to latch onto my wrist. I'm starting to wonder if I ooze milk from every pore. One of his favorite positions is flat on his back, one hand in his mouth, the other pulling a foot toward his head. He has laughed, though just a time or two. It sounds like a donkey braying, and it is adorable.

He is beginning to adore his father, and will let Rex put him to sleep with very little fuss.

He is large.

Posted by me at 3:02 PM | Comments (0)

July 11, 2008

And I'm open to suggestions

Well, damn.

I made a new banner. A miracle in itself since I don't just not know Photoshop, I don't even understand the names of the tools and have no concept what they do. I need to get a book, but unless they make one that can automagically upload to my brain, it will sit on a shelf with all my other how-to's until I upgrade and it becomes obsolete and Half-Price Books offers me 20 cents for it.

Then I went into all my templates and changed the file names from gif to jpg, because I didn't like the way the new banner look converted to gif. And I changed some of the colors in the CSS file (HELLO! orange).

Then I tried to publish all the templates.

The stupid Master Archive Index still won't publish, so now everything is half updated. I have no idea why it won't work. I've compared it to a working file and can't find a single difference. I've mucked around in everything I can find and it hasn't made a difference. I even upgraded a while back in hopes that whatever was wrong would be replaced by the new version.

I'm assuming this is part of the same problem I have publishing posts and comments. I keep hoping they'll release 4.2 and the new format they have for archives will fix and replace my errors. Barring that, I may have to wipe the whole thing and start from scratch, which scares the crap out of me since I have a tenuous grasp on how the database works, and I don't want to lose any actual content.

All that to say, sorry for mismatched look of the site.

Posted by me at 10:20 PM | Comments (0)

July 10, 2008

Two days in, and I'm ready to lower my standards

I have this huge list of things that I would like to get done while the girls are gone. Granted, most of them are things I wanted to get done even before they left, but the hope is that with two fewer kids it will be easier to knock stuff out. At the very least, running errands is simplier, since I have fewer kids to buckle and handhold and yell at them to STOP TOUCHING THINGS while we shop.

Unfortunately, most of the things on the list aren't errands, they're chores. Chores that require two hands. And some arms. Owen has yet to nap outside of my arms or the car since they left. Part of that is my fault, like today we ran a bunch or errands and so he caught a few catnaps in the car seat, or I let him sleep too long in my arms and he wakes up when I put him down. The rest is him. He's all about the one-on-one attention, even when he's asleep. On the up side, I don't have to divide my attention, and Owen has fairly simple and easy-to-meet needs. Also, I can eat all sorts of crap and I don't have to share.

All this boils down to a long list with way too few things crossed off. The things I have knocked off are the easy stuff. I haven't even bought the paint for either of the kids rooms, and I shudder to think how long it will take me to sort through all the crap in my office and file the box of papers.

Posted by me at 9:21 PM | Comments (0)

July 9, 2008

If I keep entering contests, one of these days I'll win, right?

I found Casey's blog through Blog Nosh. I like her writing, but I was totally won over by her entry for the caulk contest. I would have giggled uncontrollably, but my fear of waking the sleeping baby in my lap was just a touch stonger than my mirth. I'll do just about anything to avoid angry cranky boy. She's running a contest of her own now, and I'm just doing like she says. I haven't managed to win myself a Wii yet, but I'll settle for a new hairstyle that makes me look like I've lost 10 pounds. I'm hoping Sarah over at Hair Thursday has some nice options that don't require a lot of skill or time or, seriously, skill to maintain. There's a reason I'd rather give up underwear than my trusty ponytail holders.

Here goes:

This wasn't the picture I was trying to find when I went searching for a picture of me with bad hair. Apparently I had blocked this cut out of my memory, because seriously, how could I have not thought of it first? I can't believe my mother let me do this to myself. Worse, she let me keep getting it cut like this for several years, until the number of people mistaking me for a boy (in junior high!) traumatized me so badly I didn't cut my hair so much as an inch for almost 10 years.

This wasn't my first choice for good hair pick, but I came across it while I was looking for a great shot of my wedding hair, and decided it looked better. I can't believe how much I like it, considering the color is a result of a really mucked up home job, fixed by a moron of a stylist at a TGFesque salon. That fuzz in the picture? That isn't noise from the low light, that's DUST. I was visiting my dad's. He is not known for his housekeeping.

And this is what my hair looks like today. And yesterday. And the day before that. Repeat for the last five years. I know there's no reason a SAHM can't keep herself up, but I just don't get out enough to make it worth spending a lot of cash on hair and make-up and clothes. I'm wearing a free sample of lipstick in this picture, and it's the first time I've had make-up on in at least a year.

Note the unibrow Wee Pea has drawn on herself. Apparently my girls are doomed to inherit my skills.

Posted by me at 10:27 PM | Comments (2)

July 8, 2008

Freedom

My girls, they are gone.

This is the first time I wanted to follow discretely behind my dad as they were walking away from me at the airport to make sure everyone stayed safe. I know I'm a control freak, but that's bad, even for me.

I can't figure out why this trip is freaking me out so bad. Both girls have gone with my dad before, and for about the same length as this trip. I'm totally looking forward to the break, although it's really not that much of a break since Mr. High Maintenance is still right over there, contemplating his first nighttime snack break. (I should mention that he did awesome on the trips to and from the airport. It almost makes up for keeping me up for an hour after his second early morning feeding. It counts nothing toward prepayment of tonight's expected ordeal. That boy better keep smiling ALL DAY LONG.)

It might be that this is the first time I haven't been desperate for the break from the girls. They've been really good lately. Better than I've had any right to expect, considering the amount of time they have spent entertaining themselves around the house lately. I'm actually looking forward to them getting my dad's undivided attention, attention they so rightly deserve. There's a lot of guilt in me over the horribly uneven division of my attention. Yes, it's the natural progression of things, that older kids do more for themselves and by themselves. It's normal for babies to take lots of time (although my babies tend to be more attention hoggy than average, I think) and require some social concessions.

Still, I feel like I should do better. Could do better.

Bah. Guilt. What a useless, all consuming emotion.

For the next two weeks, the only thing I have to feel guilty about is not missing my girls enough. And the way I feel right now, that's not going to be a problem.

Posted by me at 9:49 PM | Comments (0)

July 7, 2008

The N word

I have some friends who make jokes using the n word. They aren't *really* racist, in the sense that they are happy to have friends of all colors, but they are overly amused by the stereotypes and totally willing to perpetuate them.

I, on the other hand, consider the n word a bad word, like shit or fuck or damn. Actually, it's worse, because while the usual curse words might offend someone's sensabilities, the n word is insulting to someone's sense of self. You aren't just releasing anger with a poor verbal substitute for expressive language, you're using a word that denigrates an entire race.

Now the thing is, I never use that word. Ever. And I don't let people (ok, I'll say it, family) use it in front of my kids. They may say other things that I consider inappropriate, but I draw the line at racist jokes. But when my friends, who I mostly talk to online, start yukking it up, I say nothing. I never participate, but I don't think I've ever told them to stop, either.

How bad of a person does that make me? My sense of guilt tells me that I should stand up for my beliefs, but logic tells me that I'm just going to be ostracized by the aquaintances and mocked by my friends. I don't mind the mocking, myself, we do it to each other in fun all the time. I guess I just can't see what the benefit of saying something will be. They know it's wrong. They aren't going to stop.

I guess what it really comes down to is this: Is their attitude a friendship dealbreaker for me?

Typing this out has pretty much given me the answer: They won't get past a surface friendship with me. My best friends and I have differences, but less important ones, at least to me. I'm not proud that I'm not more forceful standing up for my beliefs, but it's also hard for me to cut someone out of my life (and I've known these people for many years) based on something so common, even if it is contrary to a core belief of mine.

Man, the more I type, the more I feel like a wish washy spineless suck-up.

Posted by me at 10:22 AM | Comments (0)

July 3, 2008

Mad, but not crazy

It took me a couple days to write the post I was going to put up today, but then I decided that it doesn't fit the spirit of the 4th, so it will wait.

Instead, I will tell you about about how I'm currently peeved at Verizon. Now, generally I'm in love with Verizon. They provide me with FiOS, a gorgeously fast, seemingly always up, relatively inexpensive internet access. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I'm somewhat attached to the internet. I'm not having any trouble with my connection, which is good, because that would make me all twitchy and livid.

No, I'm having problems with my payment.

See, Verizon automatically bills my credit card every month. This has worked flawlessly for years, through moves and changes and such. But now the card they have on file is going to expire. They were kind enough to send me a notice to remind me to update my information, complete with a website and phone number to edit my information. I tried the website first because, well, I have kids, and serious phone conversation can be, well, spotty. I had no problems logging in. I found the link I needed to make the actual change. I input the correct information. It told me that the info I had entered was the same, and so no changes were made.

Uh, what? MOST of the information is the same. But I specifically changed something they had populated. And besides, it says "update/change". Doesn't that somewhat assume that maybe only a small change will be made? Who's running your database, Verizon?

I tried several times, in case it was my error. Wouldn't be the first time I've fat fingered, after all. Then I called, and talked my way through their automated voice system. God, I hate those things. The wait was estimated at 15 minutes, but oh! they have the option of calling you back when the wait time is up! You just went up a notch in my eyes, Verizon!

So I give the autolady my information, confirm, confirm again and hang up. Fifteen minutes later, she calls me back and I almost immediately get connected to Dan. He confirms my phone number, I quickly sum up my issue, and he mumbles something that I assume to be "Hold, please" since I immediately find myself listening to hold music.

Then I wait. For 20 minutes. That's when I gave up and hung up. I was hoping he might get back to me, since he obviously had my phone number. Autolady didn't bother to call back either. You would think they would want to talk to me, seeing as how I'm trying to give them more money. Regularly scheduled, guaranteed money, at that.

I haven't managed to get back to them, either. I spent most of that 20 minutes on hold trying to keep Owen happy, and I never really had another moment of peace that day. I couldn't bring myself to go to the trouble today, and tomorrow is a holiday. I imagine I'll get through to them Monday, since even pissed, I'm not willing to jeopardize my magical, mystical internet.

Posted by me at 8:21 PM | Comments (0)