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February 23, 2006
More motherly angst
Everyone keeps laughing at me and telling me that I'm the one who isn't ready for Jamie to give up her afternoon nap. And they're right.
But more importantly, Jamie needs her afternoon nap. And when neither of us get her nap, we're both grumpy in the evening.
It doesn't help that I don't react well to Jamie's defiance. She's had a few days of nasty backtalking and deliberate acts of rebellion, and I don't take that shit. And if there are hidden reasons for it (sibling jealousy, lack of attention, whatever) I don't really tend to take those into account. I'm more of a surface kind of person.
She alternates her teen-on-Springer immitation with some very sweet acts towards her sister, and towards me. She can be funny. She has an amazing memory that surprises me constantly. She talks constantly, which leads to a few hilarious mis-speaks.
And she recovers instantly from her tantrums and my rebukes. I don't recover nearly so quickly. And if my day starts out bad, a couple giggles don't really lift my whole day from the crapper.
Add that to the contrast between Katie's sweet smiles and hugs, and Jamie and I clash constantly. (Don't get me wrong, Katie isn't perfect. She's clingy and shy and demanding, but in that innocent baby way that's hard to hold against them.)
I'm not sure how to fix any of this. I can't force Jamie to nap, although I do make her stay in her room and "rest" daily, hoping the nap will follow. She doesn't sleep later the morning after a missed nap. She would go to bed earlier, but then she wakes up earlier as well, and that sure as hell isn't going to help my mood.
And only part of the problem is Jamie and her sleep habits, anyway. A big part of it is my relationship with her. I'm not sure how much of this is normal clash, how much is her age (testing limits, etc.), and how much of it is my failings as a mother (lack of patience and understanding, not providing enough amusement and attention, I could go on...).
This too shall pass.
Right?
Posted by me at February 23, 2006 9:37 PM